yellowed edges

May 10, 2013

It’s that day again.  Time to reopen the scrapbook of loss and honor the memory our son who was blessed with a life outside of pain.  It has been 5 years.  I never forget our dear Sawyer, yet as time passes, the edges of my memories fade, yellowed by the sunlight that has shown through.  Its a good kind of aging, the kind that softens the grief and absorbs many of the tears.

It is no longer as easy for the wind to catch me off guard and unexpectedly fling open my book of loss sending memories floating helplessly about the room.  I am now more able to choose when the book is opened and memories are pulled out.

Most days I keep the book safely tucked away.  I don’t often pull it out to show others but if and when I do, it is because I feel like I can trust that their fingers will gingerly touch where mine cannot always reach.  Sawyer’s story may give them something that I cannot, or their story may help comfort a part of my heart that held pain I had forgotten.

Thank you to those of you who sat with me as my scrapbook of loss was constructed.  I have been encouraged, comforted, challenged and inspired by the journey.  Thank you for remembering with us.  When your need for comfort arises, it is my prayer that you will find the same loving support enfolding you.

“He will cover you with his feathers   He will shelter you with his wings.  His faithful promises are your armor and protection.” Psalm 91:4

This video blows my book wide open with memories scattered about the room.  I invite you to watch and remember 5 years ago with me.  For those of you who are unfamiliar with our story of loss, I invite you to read more here.

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