my lie

June 04, 2012

When I was a child there was a span of time in which I was getting headaches quite often.  My mom told me she would make an appointment to see the eye doctor in case I needed glasses.  The idea that I might soon be the owner of my very own spectacles was almost too much excitement for me to handle.  ”However,” my mom cautioned, “you might not need glasses, they are only for people with poor eyesight so we will just wait and see”.

Determined not to be disappointed at the Dr. office, I set out to do all that I could to make sure my eyesight was as bad as possible.  This mostly involved holding up a magnifying glass to my eyes while trying doing daily tasks along with sitting too close to the TV and reading with low light (you know, the classic “ruin your eyes” activities).  When the big day finally arrived and I sat staring at the chart on the wall, I knew how to play this to my advantage.  As the Dr. began asking the classic “Which is better, A or B?” questions I knew just what to do (just pick the blurrier one).

After the examination was complete he reached for his big box of lenses and I was sure I had won the lottery.  Fitting two shiny lenses in his funky office frames I was giddy (yet outwardly composed).  His comment to my mother, “I have a feeling that these glasses are exactly what she needs” should have sounded a warning.  Instead I was confident that my acting had been full proof.  When I noticed that my eyesight was actually quite good looking through the lenses, I should have known better.  However, I was blinded with my own perfect plan. After asking me the same set of “Which is better?” questions (which I of course I answered perfectly) he revealed the “good news” that in fact my eyesight was wonderful and that I would not be needing glasses after all. Stunned, I was informed that the ‘lenses’ he had in his frames used were nothing more than plain glass.  Phooey.

Much to my delight however by 3rd grade I did eek out a need for glasses, weren’t they stunning ;) ?!

Although that story is now more than 20 years old, I still remember the desire I had for glasses.  So when my daughter Ashlyn accompanied me to the eye doctor to pick up my new frames (lucky me, I now get to wear glasses), I could understand her longing glances over at the cute frames hanging on the wall.  ”Mom, I want glasses too!”

As we drove home we worked out a plan.  She would do a few chores to earn $1 and we would visit the dollar store after school the next day to purchase her own pair of glasses.

After a quick adjustment (thanks to a carefully wielded hammer),

her frames were ready to be worn in fashionable style, no lies required!

Ok your turn.  Did you want glasses as a child?  Do you have any lies to share from your childhood!

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